A new year brings with it a bevy of breathless — and quickly ignored — resolutions. (Or at least jokes about same.) But this year, like last year, is a little different. Since 2020, we’ve been living amidst a once-in-a-century public health crisis that some people keep help making worse. We’ve developed, and nurtured, a lot of bad habits. So when 2022 rolled along, some celebrities offered people their own resolutions, to help people lead healthier lives in the face of unimaginable horror. But in the case of Reese Witherspoon, that do-goodery led to them being hilariously mocked.
On Monday — a few days after being dragged for supporting cryptocurrency — the Oscar-winning actress posted a list of life-changing activities she’s “working towards” in 2022. They were:
1. Start the day with a big glass of water
2. Get 10 minutes of outdoor light. [Stanford neuroscience professor Andrew Huberman] recommends morning light.
3. Spend 30-60 mins reading without distraction everyday.
4. In bed by 10pm. *no late night TV binges. Try to get 8 hours of rest!”
This is all basic but sage advice. Water, natural light, a good night’s sleep — all important. Reading is better for you than binge-watching, late night or any other time of day. You’re right, Reese.
But someone wasn’t having it. That person was Ina Garten, host of The Barefoot Contessa and serial cookbook author. In the post’s comments, Garten told Witherspoon that her advice may “sound great.” Alas, she also wrote, “Probably not doing any of those things!” She instead offered her own four tips that are…well, maybe not healthier but certainly more fun.
1. Drink more large cosmos
2. Stay up late watching addictive streaming series
3. Stay in bed in the morning playing Sudoko instead of reading a good book
4. Spend more time (safely) with people you love.”
She added, “In a pandemic, I do what I can.”
Since the pandemic began two years ago, Garten has been a cheerleader for cosmos, the tasty cocktail made famous on Sex and the City two decades back. Last month she went on TODAY with Hoda and Jenna, where she told the hosts, “At the beginning of the pandemic I thought we all needed a treat so I did the largest cosmo anybody’s ever had.” They then all shared super-sized cocktails, during a morning chat show. Living one’s best life, for sure.